My Grey Epiphany

I live in a small, nondescript house on an undesirable road in Maidstone.  The road isn't even exciting enough to be bad, it's just unremarkable. The bottom end of my road is more exciting, people get stabbed and there are raids by armed police, but I live in the top end.  All the houses except ours are rented by transient workers, Poles mostly, but there are a few Latvians and Lithuanians.  Since they raided and boarded up the crack house across the street, we're the only British people here, which is fine, but can make one feel fairly isolated. Although I lived in the Balkans for a good while, the Slavic languages differ enough that I can only understand when they're swearing at each other or asking where something is.  I live in this house with my mother, who is at best slightly kooky, and at worst, certifiably bat shit crazy.

I work in the most boring industry possible, so boring you couldn't imagine it if you tried.  You may be thinking something like "Concrete Sales", "Radiator Factory" or "Dust Analyst", and you'd be miles out.  But I love my job, I genuinely do, and wouldn't change it, I thrive on it. However, when I'm getting hit on by men (which is rarely), and they ask me what I do for a living, I just have to say the two words that name my industry and their eyes glaze over.  Instantly they look like they have been deprived of sleep for a week.  That is my world.

So, today I realised that my life consists of three things.

1.  Work.

2.  My Dog.

3.  Films starring Kurt Russell or young Charlie Sheen; watched alone at night. I often think I need a bigger television.

Upon realising all of the above, it became apparent that unless I add a few things to that list, it's only a matter of time before I get a few cats, start buying fleeces with airbrushed wolves on them, and give up on ever having real-life sex with a man again.

With this in mind, I have added to my list.

4.  Start doing Pilates again

5.  Start drawing properly again, and go to Sketchbook Club at my local pub (yeah, NO.)

6.  Stop buying unnecessary items such as food or clothing, save up for a Trans Am, fail at saving more then a few grand, then settle for a Toyota Celica.

7.  Make a blog.  That way, if I die anytime soon, I will have left some sort of mark on the world.

And so begins my attempt at Number 7.